Evolution Of A Man

When I worked at Google, one of the founders boasted (or joked) that he has a dream of, and is working on, building a space tether that will reach Mars. Recently, a friend told me of a dream he has to visit outer space- which will soon be possible as there are scientists working on a space-age vacation of sorts that will allow regular people, with the financial means and good health, to travel beyond the perimeters of earth. My friend fully intends to experience this vacation; he practically creamed himself talking about it. This is all well and good for both of these fine gents; but as for me, my dreams of space-age travel should have been accomplished years ago. Now informed that we are, apparently, well on our way to “the future” of space travel, I have one longing, unanswered question: where the hell is my hoverboard??

In the 1989  Hollywood blockbuster, Back To The Future II, Marty McFly and Doc Emmet Brown traveled far ahead to the year 2008. What they encountered was a futuristic world, that included all kinds of nifty gadgets and toys- most notably, the hoverboard.

The hoverboard is a multi-neon colored, skateboard-like toy that defies gravity by flying! I wanted a hoverboard so freakin’ bad, y’all don’t even know! From the first time I saw that movie I knew I had to have a hoverboard. Sure, I couldn’t skateboard worth a damn, but that didn’t matter. The thing could FLY! I would have been perfectly content lying on my stomach or back, whizzing down Crenshaw Blvd. on my hoverboard. This “invention” had me looking forward to 2008 like nobody’s business!

Alas, 2008 came and went, and I have yet to lay myself upon the glory that is the hoverboard. Scientists and Hollywood have let me down immensely. And now, I have to deal with tales of space tethers and outer-space vacations, while my own dreams of defying gravity remain tarnished, unaccomplished and damn near forgotten. Effin’ scientists!